Timing is Everything
by whoevenISthis
Summary: Dave decides to give his best bro a surprise visit! But what happens when Dave isn't exactly the man John expects him to be...? AU Non-SBURB, characters are about... 16 maybe? I don't know...
1. Chapter 1

AN: Okay, so... basically I've got insomnia. And I often get creative at night. Tonight's no exception. I began writing this fanfic... at the moment it's a brilliant idea, no idea if it'll continue to be one or if I'll drop it. I apologise for grammar and/or spelling mistakes, it's almost 2 AM and gosh I'm just tired this isn't like serious it's more like "Will do this until you fall asleep"...uh... yeah. Also it's FTM Dave because my brain's like "Hey you've seen it on Tumblr you're going to write a fanfic with it in it. Yeah. Good idea" and yeah...uh. That's all? Sorry if this fic's really shitty...

ONE FINAL THING. I am sorry if using British/European spellings bothers you, it's just a habit of mine whenever I write anything not for school. If it honestly bugs ya, leave a review saying that and I'll edit it and fix it up for you! C:

Now enjoy this painfully short intro-chapter-thing

* * *

You sigh and wrap the scarf just one more time around your face. When was this ever a good idea? Sure, it'd be nice to surprise John on Christmas, but gosh, you didn't realise it'd be this cold in Washington! You're sure John would feel the exact same way about Texas's summer heat, however...

Of course...there is one slight drawback to your plans. And you'd prefer to overlook it...but John will certainly question your very feminine voice...

Yeah, maybe this wasn't such a great idea. Honestly, Dave, you can be so stupid...

The look on the man sitting next to you on the bench tells you that you've voiced at least some of those thoughts. At least you aren't wearing your binder... a masculine-looking, flat-chested person with a female's voice would certainly cause confusion. Which is exactly why you regret spending so much money to fly up to see your best bro on his birthday. And then to chicken out at the last moment...

No.  
Dave Strider is not a quitter. He has never given up.  
This time will be no exception.

The next day you find yourself questioning this again as you arrive at 21605 Fir Drive, also known as John Egbert's address. You take a deep breath and knock very lightly.

Sighing, you realise no one could have ever heard that. You've come this far, you can't just give up now. Knocking a bit louder this time, you start worrying even more. What if John never speaks to you again?  
What if he judges you?  
What if he tells you he hates you?  
So many bad scenarios and you can't think of any good to balance them out.

Of course, you don't have much time to think of any, for at that exact moment, a very excited bucktoothed boy slams open the door.


	2. Chapter 2

After staring at you for a bit, John finally exclaims, "Dave! Is that really you?"

"Uh...yeah. Sup, Egbert?" you manage to nervously choke out, hopefully having made your voice sound deeper than it really is. Wow. You. Nervous. That's a first. If Bro ever found out, he'd probably never let you hear the end of it.

"Wait, but...why are you here anyway? You live like a million miles away! And now you're standing on my doorstep-oh, I get it. This is a dream. Pinch me."

"What? No. This isn't a dream. I'm actually standing here, in the flash-frozen flesh and bone, Egbert. Now, can we PLEASE go inside? I mean of course you think it's abso-fucking-lutely perfect weather out here or some shit, but some of us are actually human."

"Oh...sorry Dave! I just-it's really you! All these years of talking to you online and never getting to hear your voice or see anything but some lame pictures of you (You scoff at this. Those pictures are of the highest quality and are far from "lame") and now you're here. In person."

He steps back, allowing you to walk inside. It's much nicer in here...and smells like someone, probably his dad, is baking. Of course, knowing John, he won't let you eat it if it's made from Betty Crocker mix or something stupid like that. God, he can be such an air head...  
but John is most certainly your best bro.

"Dave...? Dave? Hey Dave!" John startles you.

"What-? I was contemplating some deep philosophical shit. Lalonde's been rubbing off on me. I've also been defrosting because how the hell do you even live in this place it's like the fucking artic circle up in here."

"Yeah, yeah, it's negative one billion out or whatever. Anyway, I had asked you if you wanted to go up to my room!"

"Oh, sure dude," you reply while unwrapping the scarf from around your neck and pretty much removing two layers of clothing. Those two layers were solely for keeping warm outside.

John runs to the stairs and you're quick to follow, not wanting to lose sight of him. He's just so... carefree. It's like you're the Oreo cookie and he's the cream. Everyone loves him and goes up to him and they only talk to you because you're right there and you compliment John so well. Or some weird metaphorical shit like that. Up the stairs the two of you go, and then into John's room.

Remember that carefree attitude you just mentioned? Well it seems to have disappeared. Replacing it is a completely serious aura surrounding John. It's actually kind of intimidating. And that's coming from YOU. A Strider. It takes a hell of a lot to intimidate a Strider. And this kid does it by just changing his attitude.

"Did I...do something wrong by coming up here, John?" you stutter while questioning him.

"No Dave. You just...you should have called or something! Dad will flip out or something when he knows someone that I met over the internet is here! Especially someone from so far away! He might think I'm a homosexual, Dave! He might think you're my boyfrie-"

"Egbert, relax. Don't you think I think about things ahead of time? Of course I do. I'm Dave Fucking Strider and I'm not stupid. I called your dad a few days ago about this. Made him swear not to tell ya. Seems like he's kept his promise. Gotta thank him for that later," you cut John off and reassure him. He seems to relax and a bit of that previous carefree-ness returns to his face.

"Oh, well that's good then! So are you just visiting for today...?" he asks you, looking for a suitcase or something, probably.

"My plan's simple. Come say hi to you, leave, come back around dinner time with my stuff, stay until Christmas...and then leave," you really thought that out well.

"Dude how long did it take you to come up with that? So are you going to go get your stuff now...? Because you've already said hi!"

"Nah, I figured I'd hang here for a bit. Make this place a bit cooler, ya know?" you smirk

"Of course. My room definitely needs to be 20% cooler or whatever..."

You jump onto his bed and lay down. It's really comfortable. John had better let you sleep with him. As in next to him, you mean. Of course. Why would your brain even think of anything else.

You think about the fact that John hasn't mentioned your voice...or anything about you really... Is he only being a good friend or does he honestly not care?

It might be a good topic of conversation...but you've never really been good at actually conversating in person to anyone but Bro. But with him it's 99% rapping, so it's pretty easy. With John, however, you have to actually say your feelings straight-out. Otherwise he would get confused probably.

You decide to mention it anyway.

"Hey John... you don't think my voice is weird, do you?" you ask, trying (and failing) to not sound awkward.

"Well, you've got a weird accent! But that's probably because you've lived in Texas all your life! But aside from that, no? Why, should I notice something?"

"No dude, I was askin' because lots of people have told me I do," that was obviously the best quick thinking ever. You deserve a Nobel Prize for that.

"Oh... well as I said, you sound completely normal to me! Or at least you sound like Dave. Not sure how normal that is..."

"You're one to talk"

You both bicker for a bit and end up laughing more than speaking. You had figured it'd be like this.

"Hey, Egbert. 'S getting late, I'm going to go get my things"

"Oh, okay! I'll see you in a little bit then Dave! Don't get lost!" he giggles.

You throw a pillow at him on your way out. 


End file.
